Life: "Those days when you just feel shitty"

It's been 2 months too late in updating this blog.
And this update is not even a beauty post. Wait, no, why am I feeling apologetic? This is a personal blog after all. Continuous typing begins now.

It's DECEMBER. The month where suicidal tendencies rise as high as obnoxiously ostentatious department store Christmas trees. The year is ending, and it's time to reflect on things that has been bothering me for quite sometime.

I've failed myself a couple of times in the span of my blog absence. You'd think that it takes a long time to make one stupid mistake up after another but noooo! I actually have the capacity to disappoint my family, my friends and myself in one go. I am grand slamming it up in the Not Impressed department.

I told myself midway this year: STOP BEING ANAL!!! Shit, I even penciled in my activities from June to December. What?! Who plans like that? ANAL RETENTIVE SHITHEADS LIKE ME THATS WHO. When I plan my life like that I get so irritated at life when there are curveballs---wow I can't even adapt like a normal human being! And I feel like I'm about to shit flames when plans get cancelled lol insane lang?

So I made a promise to myself to get rid of my organizer, get rid of any notion that life happens according to my scheduler. Because it doesn't. Get better at curveballs, Aicha. Love it. Live it. Shit happens. But don't say no to someone gifting you cute planner though!

On a non-related topic: I am so scared of showing skin. I have no clue why but, maaaan, everyday I dress like a cross between a manly girl and a young boy. It gets especially worse because in the recent years I developed an aversion to tops that hug my body. You know wai?

I am a fatso! Heya! The owner of this body is repulsed at herself, what more other people? I think I should just spare them from looking at my developing fats!

I want my skinny ass back. ;u;

But I am really beautiful though. Evidence: (quite a "determined to be disappointed" face there, eh.)

Am actually proud of myself for posting up a camwhore photo of myself. Don't remember taking one since June of this year. My resolution is to do more camwhores whether I like it or not.

I detest camwhoring quite a lot. Ironic as fuck. I especially hate solo camwhore ones! Whenever someone takes my picture I always NEED to have someone with me, too. I hate camwhore photos because I feel uselessly vain. There are a lot of vain people I know. I'm beautiful yes, I have good things; but I am human still! I still retain my weird insecurities about my caterpillar eyebrows and flat hair and thick lips to even venture into creating an entire Facebook album dedicated to my face.

I see it everyday; I don't need an album to validate over and over that yes indeed ladies and gents this is my face. But I need to do it so I will have a lot of practice with how to present myself in photos. But I think I need to put on gunk like make-up so the next time I see myself in the mirror and in pictures I'd be all: "Hayyy girl dang u so interestin' lookin'..."

To Myself: Next year, I want you to do the things you won't be able to do anymore. Dye your hair chocolate. Ombre it up with blue. Get piercings. But you won't because you're too safe and too square.

Next post won't be as crazy as this one I promise.
I will review a great deal about this chinese sweet tea I'm drinking. It's supposed to CLEAR YOUR SKIN by detoxifying those stuff inside your body and promote better digestion. Pretty cheap, too!
Stay tuned for that!

Until my next emotional breakdown.
Thanks for reading!

Travel: Aicha in Manila (My Trip Highlights)

Hey!

Ah, It's been quite some weeks of hiatus! But I am happy to report LIFE is still going so swell like you wouldn't believe. I took some time off from the busy rigors of work to enjoy myself in Manila! Being a quaint little Davaoena, this bustling metro is very new to me. I love Manila for its diversity, trains, huge malls and the food stalls galore!

Today I will delight you all with mostly food pictures from my trip :)

Had some macarons from Bizu! I FINALLY ATE REAL WONDERFUL MACARONS. Not the unappetizing macarons from a local store in the city, which is brittle, dry and not so much chewy and delightful and cracking as these little numbers:

Choco mint, Mango, Vanilla Macarons

I think Dairy Queen is my reason for catching a flight to Manila. I am like a horrendous crackhead everytime we pass by a DQ kiosk/stand: I JUST HAVE TO KEEP ON EATING DQ. Their Kit-Kat Blizzard mix has been my go-to and most-missed ice cream in the world.

Had some great food pasalubongs from Salazar at Ongpin! It was my first time to go there, so imagine my confusion! But loots were scored anyway :)

We also took some time to partake our breakfasts at The French Baker, which is divine, and I wonder why it's not in Davao yet. I love their rice meals, and their rice is served formed into a pyramid! Pyramids are KING.

Even when snacking, we go to Dairy Queen. A quick Dilly Bar is all you need to keep your strength up!

Aside from gorging myself with food, I went to The Reading Club, or "The Bookshop in Balagtas Street" as one article from the Philippine Daily Inquirer has named it. This, I think, was the highlight of my entire trip. I was floored. There is just something so intrinsically wonderful about selflessly giving your time to promote literacy and make books available to everyone! You can read my article about The Reading Club 2000 at my other blog by clicking on the link.

My three-day stay was markedly happier than my previous vacations! Maybe because this time I was prepared and we went to really good places! Here I am with Mike, in Cafe Noriter (favorite cafe in the country!) displaying my happy-face-ON.

Back in Davao and back to the drawing board!

Travel: Pearl Farm Vacation for My Summer's Last Hurrah!

June has been more than kind to me and my frazzled nerves! The past months have definitely been a handful, with work left and right, and barely having time to really take some quiet time and not get those terrifying surge of rush and panic: that-"ohhh, wasn't I supposed to finish X and Y and Z by tomorrow?!"-feeling every 5 minutes. I can tell you that's not always a happy time, that's a lot coming from me, the queen of breaking deadlines before the deadline it even realizes I'm all "...hasta-la-vista-baby!" with a smirk.

So my June vacation leaves were a kind treat to me before I got thoroughly down with burning myself out. I love that I was given 5 days (3 working days + weekends!) to feel refreshed and see a lot of places! Together with our friends Pat & Ren, we went to Pearl Farm Beach Resort which is one of the best beaches in the country.

Aside from all those food trips all over, I had also some time to practice some of my hobbies. I've been learning to watercolor now, and though it's going slow, I love the times when I just sit down quietly, tapping little brushes and splotching color on rough paper :)

And this is my watercolor desk inside my room. Bring in some Bon Iver music and you have a very happy girl.

July is catching up and I can't help feeling like I have to wait again for a long time until I can have another taste of summer. I used to feel really excited about August/September/October because it's one of the 'cooler' months but now I'm longing for summer just right after it has come to a close.

Thanks for reading!
I love strawberries.

EDIT:  I made a simple new header. Figured I needed a new one. I'm not very good at digital painting as much as I'd like but no one really makes a mistake with a meadow, some mountains and fluffy clouds, right? Featuring one of my favorite quotes in the whole world!

Life: February Brings About A Desire For Change

The start of the new year has given me so much and taken away quite a lot. This is in reference to my self and things around me affected by the changes that has made me scramble, rethink and rearrange my life accordingly!

A life update for those who care:

* I have completed building my own room! Yes! After living for so long sharing room and board with some family members in one bedroom, their messes vs. my sense for organization, some of my sisters using my products and constant running out of products I like, etcetera!

* I am returning back to my video and photography roots.

* Getting promoted at work ;)

* Pursuing my graphic art/drawing with digital drawings (I only used to do traditional, sketches and colored pencils and all that stuff)

* Loving myself despite my imperfections but learning how to highlight what I have!

<3 <3 <3

But that doesn't mean I will stop trying to better myself and find things to discover as I go along. I am very much into skincare still, and I'm not done practicing makeup yet hahahah! I'm not very good at it even until now. I can't practice as much because I don't get a lot of avenues/events where I am asked to be extra girly.

Below is today's makeup I did, when I went out to treat my family out to ice cream.

It's still not very good, huh?
I can't do nor wear dramatic eye makeup at all. I was doing the best I can D:


On a happier note: Here's us on my PROJECT 365 :) Taken today it's DAY 43, my family and Mike (le Boyfrénd) and also my close friend, Dan not in picture because he's the one who took this nifty picture of us:

A lot of new things are in store! From here on out I am not just going to limit myself on beauty products, but more on organic skin care and DIY, graphic design and life, love, books and rocking it out as a career girl and all the good things in between.

This chapter in my life makes me feel like nothing is missing. I am at a very happy place right now!
I hope you stay tuned!